It's Membership Season!
With the holiday season squarely upon us, it is time to review the past year and re-affirm your priorities. Let’s start with the review.
This past year, you bought coffee at Starbucks WAY too often. You’re well aware of the adverse effects of caffeine, and more than familiar with the madness of spending $5 per day on a coffee. 240 working days in a year, amounting to a whopping $1200 on coffee. Prime Ministers have been broomed for less egregious indulgences.
You were often impatient in traffic. Certain four letter words – ones that would shock your children – escaped your lips in moments of rage. Let’s not forget the guy you cut off last summer, how he shook his fist at you, and how you retaliated with the “Double Trudeau”. And then there is your shameful, elitist disdain of those who drive cars less expensive that yours.
You spent too much time on your smartphone when you should have been paying attention to those around you. In a nearly irredeemable moment of ignorance, you played Angry Birds while your spouse laid their love at your feet. Not having your cellphone on you is akin to not having both arms attached. You are dangerously close to having your life stories – all those beautiful, terrible things you have done – relayed in ephemeral Tweets and weak status updates.
You worked hard. This year for the first time, and it pains you that this happened so late in life, you did something that previously scared the crap out of you. This one thing that you thought impossible, was done. It was small. In hindsight, it was a nudge. You congratulate yourself on this change and, to your credit, have shared it with only your intimates. This is a strategic move. For you know that one nudge begets another and soon, there will be nothing to stop you and those who were not privy to your small victory will stand astonished as you grow beyond their expectations.
And now, time to reaffirm what’s important.
If you bought a membership last year, it’s about to expire. Expiring memberships are like bad debts. Everyone has them, and nobody will forgive them.
This membership may save – or at least enhance – your life. As a member you get these cool benefits. All for only ten bucks – a couple cups of coffee.
Please don’t make me come down there and give you the proverbial “talking to”. Keep in mind that talk solves nothing.